Being with all of the feels.
My own experience
Lost in thought, heady, escalating into fear. Mind trapped, looping over and over. Body grasping, tightening, protecting, overwhelmed, sense of dread, taking over. Numbing. Floating in and out of reality
Like a small child holding on tightly amongst the unknown, trying desperately to attach to a sense of safety, the familiar. A loving soothing caregiver
It was a deep bodily experience of fear, gut clinching, waves of nausea, jaw locking, throat tightening, yet familiar, some place I’d been before
This is how I woke a few days ago, after having felt relatively grounded and calm the past week during the unfolding of Covid-19 here in New Zealand.
I have a very strong Fear memory embedded in my being, infused with heightened sensory awareness. This body, always at the ready to fight, flight or freeze
As many times before, I chose to stay with fear, with discomfort, with not knowing, with grief. The edges softened some. Sinking into a deeper knowing this to shall pass. Much like the current chaotic nature of our world
Throughout the rest of the day I gently tending to what I needed in each moment, while hubby took care of the children
Simple practices I draw on to settle my nervous system were in no particular order:
Drinking tea, warm salt bath, walked the dog, massaging oil into my skin, breath practice using scent, snuggling with a hot water bottle, picking flowers, resting on the bed, read, tennis ball rolling
I invite you to find a small collection of rituals you can resource yourself with through these challenging times. They might look quite different from mine. Choosing to practice these rituals daily and make them a non negotiable will bring you much comfort and ease if even for a moment. I know this to be true
Being human is hard sometimes. Instead of shaming or diminishing your experience, gently take your hand in a way you would a loved one and offer up the gift of deep love and compassion. With Love Nicki x
Nicki Hanning, is the creator and chief alchemist of True Mindful Beauty. A recently certified Meditation teacher, massage therapist, natural skincare formulator and mother of 2, who has lived and breathed holistic health for more than 25 years. Her passion is in empowering women to embody their deepest nature, physically, emotionally, spiritually and mentally through nourishing daily practices. Infusing your ordinary everyday routines into sacred self-care rituals, inspired by plants, while cultivating a deeper sense of self compassion, acceptance, inner knowing and moments of stillness. She believes meeting life fully present and awake through our senses is pure magic. Slowing down and tending to our own needs with our full attention is no longer a nice to have, but vital in how we choose to show up in our already chaotic fast paced world. She feels it’s time for a cultural shift away from struggle and stressed out, into living a more deeply connected nourished life.
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Bringing the beauty of nature indoors is a precious way to connect more deeply with Mother Earth.